Alan Baiss

Victoria, California, United States
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Human Potential Relieved in Film

<p>I am a little astonished to find myself the steward of&nbsp;<em>Conscious</em>.&nbsp;&nbsp; I had no background in filmmaking or Integral Yoga when we began our first film,&nbsp;<em>Integral Consciousness: Sri Aurobindo&rsquo;s Yoga and how Haridas Chaudhuri brought it to the West</em>, released in 2008.&nbsp;&nbsp; This adventure began quite unexpectedly and I suppose it was naivety and the quest of an ideal that kept me going. &nbsp;&nbsp;</p> <p>I think the journey began while I was a psychotherapist in private practice in British Columbia.&nbsp; I had graduated from the California Institute of Integral Studies (CIIS) in 1991 and then pursued a good career in Psychotherapy for over a dozen years when three very personal challenges influenced me to follow a new direction.&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;</p> <p>The first challenge was my coping with my parents' passing within six months of each other in 2002.&nbsp; After my parents passed it was clear to me that my life would never be the same again.&nbsp; I sensed a longing for greater meaning and realised that I didn&rsquo;t want to look back on my life and wonder what might have been.&nbsp;</p> <p>Less than a year after my parents passed a friend and I travelled to Kansas.&nbsp; We were visiting friends and asleep in their house when fire broke out in the kitchen at about 2:00AM. &nbsp;Believing that others were trapped by the rapidly spreading flames I remained too long and the advancing inferno quickly blocked my escape.&nbsp; Labouring to breath I experienced an invisible presence imploring me to &lsquo;get out now&rsquo;. &nbsp;Groping along the floor I fumbled for what I thought was a table lamp and, with this in hand, I smashed a window.&nbsp; I scrambled through the shards of glass and once outside I collapsed.&nbsp; Moments later I gazed up and standing before me were each of my friends, mercifully everyone had escaped.&nbsp; Although the fire hoses did their best the house burnt for most of the night.&nbsp; In time I dealt with my trauma, but this experience had ignited a burning aspiration to create space in my life for some greater potential.</p> <p>About a year after the fire another challenge came when a dear friend&rsquo;s body began failing from AIDS.&nbsp; It felt deeply right for me to offer myself during his final months and this is when I closed my psychotherapy practice.&nbsp; For me my friend&rsquo;s dying was a painful and profoundly rich experience.&nbsp; He was anxious about death and had been consumed by his fight for life.&nbsp;&nbsp; I sense he may have only found peace during his last few hours.&nbsp; After my friend passed I had no clear plan, but having felt called to return to San Francisco ever since graduating from CIIS I left my home in Canada and headed south.&nbsp;</p> <p>One Sunday after I arrived in San Francisco Hilary Anderson, former&nbsp;professor, dean, and founding board member of CIIS, offered a workshop at the Cultural Integration Fellowship (CIF) on CIIS founder Haridas Chaudhuri.&nbsp;&nbsp; I was interested because I knew little about Dr. Chaudhuri.&nbsp; As the workshop unfolded I sat completely dumbfounded.&nbsp; Moment by moment a passionate discourse from those who had been Dr. Chaudhuri&rsquo;s students revealed a spirit that I had always felt at the core of CIIS, but that I had never been able to put my finger on.&nbsp; During the concluding moments of the workshop Hilary turned and asked if I would like to share.&nbsp; Still flabbergasted, but with the floodgates now unlocked, my enthusiasm spilled over and culminated with my pronouncement that this was amazing and needed to be filmed.</p> <p>In short order Hilary and I assembled a small committee and received a grant from CIIS to make a film on Dr. Chaudhuri.&nbsp; After much planning, and hours of filming interviews, we made the difficult decision to halt the project.&nbsp; It had become clear that a film on Dr. Chaudhuri needs a good explication of Integral Yoga, and a film featuring Integral Yoga must carefully and respectfully present Sri Aurobindo and the Mother.&nbsp; It was a very different film that wanted to be made and it would be deeper and broader than we had imagined.&nbsp; We would begin again, and this time much more talent and money would be needed.&nbsp; In 2008 we finished and released&nbsp;<em>Integral Consciousness</em>, our first film.</p> <p>This was the start of a journey that now encompasses three films and has transformed my life and my worldview. &nbsp;I suppose it should not surprise me that this amazing adventure is taking me on such a rich, challenging, and mysterious inner journey. &nbsp;</p> <p>I sense that&nbsp;<em>Conscious</em><em>&nbsp;</em>has the potential to contact something of the sacred, and as long as I have the profound honour and privilege to be its steward I will do my best to follow the deepest wisdom I am capable of.&nbsp;</p> <p>&nbsp;</p>

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