Knowledge that you contributed to making an internet meme come true. Not only that, but for all donors we will include a card sent along with the vehicle with your name (real or avatar) telling Vice President Biden just how awesome you think he is.
Not really, Vice President Biden is too awesome for mere alcohol. But the image is a nice one.
To inhale some amazing carburetor-y exhaust from Joe Biden's steel chariot of fun times. Donate $15 and you and a friend will be able to pay your own way to Washington, D.C. and get a nice big ole sniff of some exhaust from Biden's Bodacious Behemoth. We'll also give you a silicon wrist bracelet for to show all your friends that you care about things.
Ever wanted a piece of clothing that would instantly increase your charisma, strength, stamina and constitution? Yeah, me too. Instead, you can donate $25 or above and receive a limited edition, incredibly lousy t-shirt. You'll be able to show the world that you think silly things on the internet that help people is totally cool. Please see pics of said t-shirt to your left.
of Fightin' Joe's Jock Strap. That's right. You donate $50 and Vice President Biden will let you touch a corner of his jock. It has been known to cure blindness, cause women to speak in tongues and is one of the largest known reservoir of Conservative Tears this side of Massachusetts.
Contribute $100 and we'll let you sign a pair of Biden's jorts. You will somehow have to find out where the Vice President is, locate his jorts and evade large and muscle-y Secret Service agents, but we'll let you do it.
Experience the joy only Joe knows by washing his Trans Am* /Jorts and six pack not included. //Will not actually be able to wash the Trans Am. ///Will be able to wash my car for an additional fee.
Feel the raw power of American muscle and Joe Biden's perspiration as you take the Bird on a short, and felonious, tour of the White House Rose Gardens. *Because some people are dumb, you will not be able to do this. What we will do is provide you a printed, color copy of all the threads on Fark.com relating to this project. You'll be able to see the wit, stupidity and humor of Farkers as they embark on a mission to make this meme a reality. We'll also give you all perks listed above.
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One thing Uncle Joe doesn't like is driving and drinking alone. You can also behold the awesomeness that is Trans Am ownership with your very own 1/18th replica of Bad Joe Biden's Trans Am. *Will also include all previous perks and a certificate of thanks for being a Bad Ass. *Will also attempt to have the car signed by Joe Biden if at all possible.
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