Short Film Scriptwriting - Keep It Fresh

IndieGoGo presents our new Monthly Blog featuring author, filmmaker & film consultant Roberta Marie Munroe.

After watching thousands (yes, thousands) of short films there a quite a few stories that tend to stand out - and not in a good way. A great short has a solid story, interesting characters and seemingly high production values. Whether you had a fat budget or not, whether it's a narrative, documentary, animation or experimental the required elements for success are the same.

You have got to keep the audience waiting to see what's going to happen next. You do not want them knowing exactly what's going to happen next because the script relies on predictable and clichéd story lines. Get busy, get creative and get re-writing.

It's my life's purpose to see that every filmmaker embarking on creating a short film has all the tools they require to succeed. This list below are some clichés to avoid. (Also included are a few shorts illustrating such clichés):

• Tracking shot of feet (running through forest, walking across wooden floor, clicking against the pavement).
• Loser stalks girl, has overweight friend who smokes and swears a lot, ultimately gets girl.
• Kid gets thrown out of house for being gay.
• Woman masturbates (or simply breathes heavy) while reciting poetry.
• People having sex (fully clothed) in positions where it would be impossible.
• Soldiers from different sides of the war must make allegiances (looks like you shot it in Griffith Park).
• Modern dance sequence in midst of troubled narrative.
• Break-up film with close up shots of happy couple photos that ends with sad, tragic walk on the beach at dusk (or in the rain) with unlicensed Cold Play playing behind credits.
• Guys sit around doing cocaine talking about making a movie about their lives.

Some examples:
   

Believe my friend - it will be painfully obvious that you've watched Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction, The Royal Tenenbaums, Dodgeball and Schlindler's List twenty times and what festivals, agents, managers and most importantly audiences are looking for is a director who has a fresh vision and the ability to successfully and economically accomplish this great feat.

Here's my top 10 tips for script revision:

1. Assess each secondary character and if they don't make a significant contribution to the story - cut them.
2. If your budget is less than $15,000 limit yourself to 2 locations.
3. Rethink scenes where you have more than one actor in a moving car.
4. Look for repetitions - does your lead say the same thing but in a different way. i.e. "Dude, she left and I'm devastated" later repeating "I don't know what I’m going to do without her." Give your audience the courtesy of creating their own emotions and make the dialogue so compelling the first time around that you don't need to reiterate it to make your point.
5. If your script is about the relationship between 2 (or more) straight or gay men think outside the box. Straight men do more than bowl, play pool, drink beer, and generally speak more than one sentence at a time.
6. If your script is about the relationship between 2 (or more) straight or gay women, again, think outside the box. Women tend to create dialogue delving into the subject head-on - allow your female characters the depth they require.
7. Without question, unless your budget is at least $40,000, avoid battle fields, bar scenes, and anything that requires the audience to believe there are more than 7 people in the scene.
8. Investigate your locations! It will be obvious you, the writer, have never been to a basketball shoe marketing meeting when you have a location that looks like an insurance company board room.
9. When asking outside help for script evaluation, evaluate the people you're asking. Make sure to be very clear on what kind of notes your looking for. You want to hear both what they liked and what they thought didn't work. Many a writer/director has been dropped into a pit of suicidal depression when friends/colleagues send back a 'critique' of their script. If you can't afford to hire a professional consultant make sure you protect your work with clear guidelines.
10. The number one thing you want people to get when reading your script is WHO these people are, WHAT they're doing and WHERE they are doing it and WHY they're doing it. Be concise, but also be descriptive. i.e. ROBERTA MUNROE, 43, mixed race Black woman, voluptuous and stylishly dressed sits poolside at the Standard Hotel bar sipping a scotch on the rocks as she flirts with boyish, sexy, young bartender.

IndieGoGo is proud to be included in Roberta Munroe's book, How Not To Make A Short Film: Secrets From A Sundance Programmer.

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Next: Finding The Right Producer For Your Short Film

 

Comments

[christian louboutin]

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